Lies… And the people that tell them.

Morning Gorgeous xx

Hope you’re all OK and staying safe. Times are troubled, life is changing and we all have reason to worry about something. For some it’s greater than others; but all our worries are valid nonetheless. Take comfort in the knowledge that everything changes, that’s the purpose of time. Believe in that, if nothing else.

Right, that was a quick into for me that. I’m normally blabbering on about everything, as I usually do. It’s my trademark. It’s how I write. it’s WHAT I write. It will be my legacy – This blog and everything in it. But I don’t treat it like a blog, I treat it like a diary. These are the thoughts that run around in my head at 3am, and they have to come out. We’re all like this; it’s human nature. And to do what I’m doing is the ultimate expression of the man / machine interface. What’s in my head, is on this page, and you need a machine to read it. How mad is that?

Anyway. As with all of these posts; there is a raison d’etre for their existence. Bearing in mind the fact that it actually bloody kills me to write these things, there has to be a reason (I wouldn’t write them otherwise – Next post, I’ll talk about my hand; that HAS to come out). And there is a reason for this one. The title, yet again, says it all. It’s about how and why people lie, because everybody does – Including me! I’m no exception, I’ve told lies; half truths, expanded on the truth to make a point. We all do it. As is mentioned in the Bible; “let he who hath never sinned cast the first stone” and Lying is a Sin – There, there is my Catholic background right there for you. You want to know Vikki? There she is. In all her glory (Yeah right).

But it’s right though. Everybody. EVERY BODY. Has told a lie at some point; for whatever the reason. Doesn’t matter how big or how small it was; you’ve done it. You might have to put some thought into remembering it; to realise that I’m right, but you’ve done it. It’s the human condition. It’s consciousness. We all have those moments where we talk about something, but our memory lets us down; so we fill in the blanks. It’s the Quantum Phenomenon of consciousness itself – There is no Yes / No, there’s always a Maybe. Always.

What really does the damage though, in human society, is those people who exert that third option for their own gratification. Their the real liars. They’re the people who will make you believe a situation to be truthful, in order for you to follow a train of thought; to a conclusion that did not happen (or is not real). They Lie. They want you to believe something in order for you to follow their train of thought, and, ultimately, reject everything other than their constructed reality. In order for you to act upon that information in a predetermined way

Religion is the biggest Lie of all, let’s be honest about this. Their all based on teachings from a book, that book was written by somebody, and that someone did not remember everything that happened in exact detail (or none of it was true in the first place – But that’s unlikely, as there is a a grain of truth in every story). It’s how the human mind works. We don’t just make things up; we use what we know in order to construct a reality and we then use that reality to write a story; every author does it, including me right now. You wouldn’t be reading this otherwise; be honest.

But I don’t want you to believe what I say, not every author does. I don’t want you to read this and take it as gospel; because it’s not. I’m not writing the Bible Version 2.0! Fuck that! What! Get over it. No. These are my thoughts, from my head, based on occurrences that are happening in my life; right now. My mind is telling me to write this down, and my body picked up my laptop and wrote it. Most of it Automatically, I ain’t gonna remember writing this at 9am tomorrow morning! And I’m not gonna flipping care either – I’ll just ask people to read it and see what they think; most say it’s world-class, others have a different opinion; and you’re all entitled to that opinion. But most of all, enjoy. It’s written for your entertainment, not mine; most of these posts are written as I’m crying into glass of wine. Yeah, for real; contact me if you need proof…

But look, what’s brought this on tonight? Why are you feeling so much pain that you’ve got to write it down? – Well, I can’t give you the details of that, sorry. That wouldn’t be fair on the individuals involved (See Toiletgate if you want an idea of why I do things this way). It’s not fair on other people, this is not other peoples work. This is my work, this is my life, these are my thoughts and memories; shared just for you. Because I HAVE to write these things down. Somehow. I’d be dead if I didn’t; you have my word on that.

What I can say, is, that there is a situation that has destroyed me and my life. It’s been going on for over 30 years and it’s a core problem that I have to deal with; but I can never resolve – Because it’s not my problem, so I can’t resolve it. The person who’s problem it is, has a problem with me because of WHO I am. And they’ve seen me as an easy target because of WHAT I am. And they’ve taken steps to destroy me because of jealousy on both of those parts. I’m not jealous of them, and I didn’t start this. I also didn’t want this and I sure as hell don’t fucking need the shit that comes with it. For fucks sake, no.

But. The person who’s problem it is believes their own lies to a point where they can only ever see what’s in the mirror. They can’t see the truth, and probably never will. It may also be that they constructed a reality, at the expense of other people, in order for a perception to be bought by others. Why would it not be the case? Most lies are told for a reason – We don’t just lie because we can, unless we’re so far deep in our own fucking web that we can’t see daylight (and god love the person who’s down there, I have the utmost sympathy for them). There is ALWAYS a reason. Every liar has something to hide. Whether it be their own mistake, whether it be the fact that they can’t remember the truth, or, whether it be a deliberate and intentional lie in order to construct a different reality that what was actually true – Either way, there’s a fucking reason for it.

And am I using strong language again? You know when I use that kind of language; that the issue at hand is close to my heart – The stronger I feel, the stronger the language I use. I do apologise, if I have offended; it’s not intentional, I assure you.

However, if you feel someone is lying to you, get to the bottom of that reason. Do not allow people to lie to you, or for you, or (most definitely) against you. Webs of lies… Rhetoric. They do nothing but cause harm. Boris? Hmmm…

Rhetoric. There’s a word. Never believe someone’s Rhetoric. And I can only give my deepest sympathies to those that do.

Love and Light,

Vikki xx

By Vikki Kinsella

My name is Vikki, and I’m a Transgender Female living and working in the UK.

I’ve started this blog purely as a way of writing down my thoughts and feelings, as I now start my journey through transition from living life as Male to becoming Female, and beyond. You see, I spent 45 years of my life living as, what is now known as, a cisgender Male - With almost no idea that I could even consider being Female, let alone consider corrective surgery. But I must admit I did have a tendency to THINK like a woman sometimes... But doesn't every Man think like a woman on occasion? Don't try and hide it boys, you know you do, lol...

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