A Brave New world… Part 2

Well. It’s been a very interesting day today – definitely kept me on my toes. Friends are very supportive of this blog, so I’m definitely going to sort it out and keep it up. But I’ve also had some very interesting conversations in the smoking shelter at work! I’ll try and recall most of it but I can’t guarantee the content will be accurate – or suitable for younger audiences! 😲 lol…

So, here in the UK, the media is having a whale of a time focussing on the Transgender community; and the issues we face. And it’s gathering pace.

I’ve noticed four specific media events since I came out and started to transition. Yet before, as much as I was aware of the Trans community through friends. I had no idea there was so much going on.

Specifically, it started late last year with a Television programme on BBC2 called “Being Transgender”. It was part of the Horizon series of factual documentaries that predominantly focus on Human Interest issues from around the globe. The issues vary wildly across a broad spectrum of topics, but the focus is very direct in getting to the heart of the issue.

When the program was shown, I was already aware I was trans and at the very beginning of my transition. Therefore I identified with being transgender, but not with the greater community at large. The people who the filmmakers chose were, to me, broadly eccentric. On the edge of the Trans community, as I thought, and were single mindedly focussed on one particular issue. They were also extremely defensive of being Trans. I could not understand why.

Next came Piers Morgan this year, and at the same time Celebrity Big Brother 2018. But I’ll deal with them separately.

Piers Morgan first. His first program in his new series focussing on the private lives of Television and Media Celebrities was with a Transgender Icon who I’ve previously had a lot of trouble even relating to. That person was Caitlyn Jenner. Her story is well known, so I won’t repeat. But I will say, that the interview was very candid and forthcoming. I relayed to some of her issues. Especially regarding having to hide – although I think I did a better job of it 😂

But I still couldn’t get her attitude. Damn, that attitude.

Anyway. Next was CBB2018 and I was introduced to India Willoughby. This is a woman I really thought I could identify with. And as I discovered more of her story, I can relate more to it. I get it. Either you know, or you don’t, you hide or you don’t. You get angry, sad, depressed. Panic, Anxiety. All related to body dysphoria (I won’t use gender for the specific reason that I’m talking in physical terms – the mental issues are another story).

India was normal. My age and had transitioned. Well done. Or so I thought.

As the series continued, it became ever more apparent that India also has an issue, an issue I need to work out; because I don’t have it. I’m, as we say, laid back and pragmatic. Almost lying down in my approach. To most things my attitude is get over it, sort it and move on. But it seems transgender women are not like that. Is that what I am to become?

A particular issue that India faces is the issue of sexuality. I mentioned in my previous post that you would never have known I was a Trans Woman. And talking to a friend, she advises that all she knew; was that I was a little effeminate in my life but she couldn’t work out why. That’s fine, I was a straight, cisgender male. So was India. She is now a straight transgender female. As will I be. Honestly, get over it.

I’ll tell you what, I’ll give her a hand. I read a series of books a few years back called “The Sex Gates”. They’re interesting reading when it comes to trans issues as the story line revolves around mysterious gates that appeared worldwide and they change the sex of anyone who goes through them. They were written by Darryl Bain about 12 years ago. Go find them.

They basically say, if you’re sexually straight in one body, you will be straight in another. The problem is getting used to the fact that you now have a different set of sex organs and your sexual feeling will be different. Your personality remains the same. It’s still you, just different. And maybe better.

My point is that trans people seem to have this attitude of expecting other people to see things that way, but they can’t see it themselves.

Get over it.

There’s no way a man is consciously getting near me while I have male equipment. But once I’m female, I’m going to want sex with a man. Period. That’s what my breakdown was all about. I had to work that out for myself first. No doubt when the time comes I’ll make sure I’m ready for it.

Anyway, I said there were four things in the media and I’ve only mentioned three. The fourth one is a Television series on BBC2 called “Transformation Street”. Watching the first programme in the series moved me to tears and is the reason I write this now.

Go watch it if you can and post a response.

I have to go, I need to go fire some arrows. Back soon.



By Vikki Kinsella

My name is Vikki, and I’m a Transgender Female living and working in the UK.

I’ve started this blog purely as a way of writing down my thoughts and feelings, as I now start my journey through transition from living life as Male to becoming Female, and beyond. You see, I spent 45 years of my life living as, what is now known as, a cisgender Male - With almost no idea that I could even consider being Female, let alone consider corrective surgery. But I must admit I did have a tendency to THINK like a woman sometimes... But doesn't every Man think like a woman on occasion? Don't try and hide it boys, you know you do, lol...

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