Dysphoria is Real…

Morning gorgeous xx

Had to post this, and it’s not pretty I’m afraid…

But anyone who suffers from any type of dysphoria will know how real it is. How real it can be and how it can make your feel…

Well I’ve just had a massive bout of it in work. It knocked me for six. Sat there staring at yourself, quietly freaking out as you don’t see what you should see and you know it’s wrong. But you also know that what you see is Real and you can’t change it, yet. You begin to wonder what is it all for? Why are you doing this? Did you ever feel like this before? And what if you still didn’t know? Would you be any better off?

The truth of those questions is that you know why you’re doing it – You’re trying to fix it. And you did feel like that before, you just hid it well and it wouldn’t make any difference whether you knew or Not, the problem is still there.

But the best part, is no you wouldn’t be any better off. You’d be worse off. Worse, because you’d still be hiding those feelings instead of finding a way to deal with them. Worse, because you wouldn’t be able to show how you feel. And definitely worse because you’d never be happy.

I write this to help me feel happy and because I can now show the world how I really feel.

I’ll get there, step by step.

Much Love,

Vikki xx

By Vikki Kinsella

My name is Vikki, and I’m a Transgender Female living and working in the UK.

I’ve started this blog purely as a way of writing down my thoughts and feelings, as I now start my journey through transition from living life as Male to becoming Female, and beyond. You see, I spent 45 years of my life living as, what is now known as, a cisgender Male - With almost no idea that I could even consider being Female, let alone consider corrective surgery. But I must admit I did have a tendency to THINK like a woman sometimes... But doesn't every Man think like a woman on occasion? Don't try and hide it boys, you know you do, lol...

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