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Out with the old…

Morning Gorgeous xx

You all good today? Hope so. I know it’s Monday and all of that, everyone swimming their way back to work after torrential downpours here in the UK, lol. But it’s all good.

I’m in a bit of a funny place this morning. My head is clear (makes a change), I’m calm and I know what I’ve got to do today – This doesn’t happen often in my life. Need more of this 🙂

I feel like my head has had a busy night though, it’s flipping pounding in there. I’m like, WTF??? What just happened? If that was a dream, then ‘My God!’; what a dream! I look back down the hallway towards the bedroom thinking; “What happened in there?’. I mean I know I had a restless night, but WHAT!

The good thing about days like these, is these are the days when plans are formed. Days when I have to get up and do something, talk to someone, anything. Need the head busy. So that’s what I’m going to do today, got to get busy. But I need some help, not sure my head is organised enough to do this on my own.

Anyway; I woke up this morning, I went to the Bathroom, then the Kitchen, then here. That says a lot about what I’m going to do. You see the thing is, I’m not going to able to move on with my life until all this crap is out of my head. Which is what the blog is about, moving forward, transitioning, starting a new life, out with the old and in with the new. Well the next stage of my transition is definitely ‘out with the old’ – the floodgates are well and truly ‘Open’.

Facebook make a change tomorrow; they stop third party apps posting to personal profiles – only public pages. This is a world-wide change becuase of the recent data misuse scandals they’ve been embroiled in. I’ve already setup my public page and blogged about it, it’s ready to go. I’m going to invite people to like the page and it’s optional if you do or don’t – I won’t hold it against you if you dont, that’s not me; if you know me.

Still, my head sees August 1st as a kind of D-Day. It’s at that point that everything is setup where I need it to be and I’ve got complete freedom to just write what I want. Everything that’s in my head, I can get it down on paper. Finally. And whether you believe what I write, take it with a pinch of salt, or plain laugh at it; that’s not the point. The point is, I’ve been looking for a creative outlet for a long time now, a way to release this energy that’s built up inside of me.

I don’t have any of the music I used to write anymore (well, two tracks remain and I might add them later) – and I pains me that can’t do that anymore with my fingers the way they are. I’ve been frustrated for so, so long and it’s torn me apart. But I’m transitioning, and when you transition, everything changes; including you – especially you. You change into who you WANT to be, not who everyone expects you to be. I get a feeling I might be finding myself again, lets just hope I’m right…

Much Love,

 

Vikki xx

 

By victoriak72

My name is Vikki, and I’m a Transgender Female living and working in the UK.

I’ve started this blog purely as a way of writing down my thoughts and feelings, as I now start my journey through transition from living life as Male to becoming Female, and beyond. You see, I spent 45 years of my life living as, what is now known as, a cisgender Male - With almost no idea that I could even consider being Female, let alone consider corrective surgery. But I must admit I did have a tendency to THINK like a woman sometimes... But doesn't every Man think like a woman on occasion? Don't try and hide it boys, you know you do, lol...

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