The Hardest Thing… Part II

Evening gorgeous xx

How are you all today? Good I hope. Had a busy day? Hope you’re finally relaxing and enjoying your evening…

Well this is the first of two posts I’m going to write tonight; before I sign off. I’ve been meaning to write them for days, but there’s been one hell of a lot going on. Seriously, too much to explain in one post – I shit you not 😉

One specific thing that has been happening; definitely requires its own post, and that’s what this one is for – A post regarding a historic crime I detailed not so long back. The crime detailed in the post “The Hardest Thing I’ve Ever Had To Write…”

The crime of Rape.

But this post is not about the crime itself; for that, read the first post. But you see, in order for a crime to be reported; the victim has to give evidence – make a statement. And the police, once they have that evidential statement; have to act on that in accordance with the relevant law. That’s how it all works. You want justice, you have to be honest and upfront about what happened. And stick to the events that occurred.

So, when I detailed what happened to me on the blog; I immediately contacted the police. I had to, I was reporting a crime. That’s what had happened and it had to be dealt with.

I wasn’t expecting an outcome (and I still don’t), but I had to do the right thing, finally, and report it. So that’s what I did.

They took me extremely seriously, which I was surprised at – I have reported crimes to the police before; but haven’t had the treatment I deserved, or the outcome I expected.

I went ahead and reported the basics, was told it was out of area and would be referred; and to wait for a call back. It came. Promptly. The officer was really nice and took my story, even pausing while I recovered from the panic I got myself into. The crime was recorded; relevant law states it was Rape. I need to give video evidence. This must be investigated and referred to the Crown Prosecution Service. They’re taking it seriously. I felt better.

Since then other things have happened and my life is changing – massively, for the better. But I was still scared of giving video evidence. It mortified me.

It was arranged with an officer here; for her to come and see me. She was lovely and made me feel completely at ease. She arranged to take my statement at a time that suited us both (with a lot going on, it’s been hard), she’s kept in touch. And an opportunity looked like it was going to arise at the weekend. Which it most certainly did, and I took it – I knew I had to do it. So, at the weekend, I went in; accompanied by some close friends.

I cannot believe I had the courage within me to do it.

But I did.

And I will say this to anyone who’s been in my situation; and hasn’t had the courage of their convictions – there’s more of you than you think, isn’t there? Just because the outcome may not be what you want, get into a police station and report it. Don’t think that it will automatically result in a conviction, it doesn’t work like that. Don’t go in there thinking about them; that you can get them, that you can get justice because of what they did, it doesn’t always happen like that.

Go in there and report what happened to you, for you; for your piece of mind, for your self-esteem. Because if you don’t go in there and report what happened, and detail what you went through, and relive it (as hard as it is to do). You’ll never get over it, you’ll never come to terms with it and you’ll always run from it. Just like I did.

For 36 years…..

Much Love,

Vikki xx

By Vikki Kinsella

My name is Vikki, and I’m a Transgender Female living and working in the UK.

I’ve started this blog purely as a way of writing down my thoughts and feelings, as I now start my journey through transition from living life as Male to becoming Female, and beyond. You see, I spent 45 years of my life living as, what is now known as, a cisgender Male - With almost no idea that I could even consider being Female, let alone consider corrective surgery. But I must admit I did have a tendency to THINK like a woman sometimes... But doesn't every Man think like a woman on occasion? Don't try and hide it boys, you know you do, lol...

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