Changing Consciousness

Morning Gorgeous xx

How are you all doing today? Hope you’re all happy with everything or in the process of changing that you are not happy with. You see, change brings about renewal. And renewal creates new opportunities and experiences for us to learn from. And learning helps us grow into better people who can effect or assist change in others – depending on what we’ve already learnt, of course.

Well the last few days have been a learning curve for me, there’s no two ways about that. I’ve learnt enough over the last five days to raise my entire consciousness up one level. I’ve done that because I’ve had to learn to trust people, trust not only what they say and do; but also their motives and instincts. Effectively, I’ve had to learn to trust WHY someone is doing something, but I wasn’t in a position to outright ask the question – I had to learn it on the go. On top of that, my own motives for certain things were also brought into question; and I was judged on my actions once those questions were raised, as well. So as I say, it’s been a tough, very tough, few days.

But I’ve come out the other side, and I’m happy with the result. It leaves me with some very important questions that I must answer, and only I can answer them. The good thing is, I will. By the time we hit Wednesday; I’ll have all the answers I need – That’s a bit quick, you say? Yeah it is. But I know HOW to answer these questions, and that makes a big difference.

While all this is going on, another little rears it’s head; to do with my past. The problem of acknowledging my past and its existence. And that maybe I need to put it right, that maybe I haven’t been as honest with myself, regarding certain things, as I should have been. And it actually tied in quite nicely to what is going on now, without me realising it. Well, I’d actually like to thank the person, from my past, who raised this. They know who they are, and they know where I went wrong. And I did go wrong, VERY wrong. You see, it’s not fair to dissolve four years of your life down to a single sentence; whatever the reason may be. Especially as those years had a profound impact on my life – I’ll put it right chicken, you have my word.

And that brings me neatly onto my final point – I’ve started work on another blog.

You see; I have this blog, Feeling Trans, and this blog is designed to tell you about how I feel. And that’s great, lets all get serious & shit and educate the world; one page at a time. Phenomenal. But as you can see, I am a person, I have a sense of humour and I like to be less serious about things from time to time.

So I’ve started another blog in order to take a less serious approach to the path of Transitioning. And I’d like you to meet Martha Shitapple – The Six Foot Scouse Tranny, lol. Martha is going through hell, just like I did. But Martha’s journey is a lot more Jovial than mine. Her exploits; such as climbing in through a friends bedroom window the night after a party, in order to retrieve her phone. Are definitely a lot more comical than mine, oh my days; the things she’s going to get up to. I hang my head in shame.

I’ve put a link to the blog in the main menu and I’ll link that blog with this; so you can traverse between the two. Don’t expect each event to appear in both blogs at the same time, they are two very different journeys. Just one is based on the other.

Go take a read, see what you think, I’m off to bed.

Much Love,


Vikki xx

By Vikki Kinsella

My name is Vikki, and I’m a Transgender Female living and working in the UK.

I’ve started this blog purely as a way of writing down my thoughts and feelings, as I now start my journey through transition from living life as Male to becoming Female, and beyond. You see, I spent 45 years of my life living as, what is now known as, a cisgender Male - With almost no idea that I could even consider being Female, let alone consider corrective surgery. But I must admit I did have a tendency to THINK like a woman sometimes... But doesn't every Man think like a woman on occasion? Don't try and hide it boys, you know you do, lol...

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